100% AMERICAN COMFORT. 0% PERSONAL GROWTH. ★ ALL PRICES IN FREEDOM DOLLARS ★
✦FREEDOMT O U R S   ★   U S AEXPORT YOURSELF ↗
THE WORLD IS YOUR FOOD COURT.

GO ABROAD.
STAY AMERICAN.

All the passport stamps.
None of the perspective.

Experience the breathtaking beauty of other countries from the climate-controlled safety of your own expectations.

FIND MY FOREIGN AMERICA ↗
★ No local cuisine.   ★ No exchange rates.   ★ No growth.
An eagle in aviator sunglasses towers over international landmarks, burgers, fries and American flags in an extravagant travel poster
THE PLANET.NOW WITH RANCH.
CULTURE
0%
GUARANTEED
★ USD ONLY★ CHAIN RESTAURANTS ONLY★ FAHRENHEIT EVERYWHERE★ EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ICE
INTERNATIONAL LOCATIONS. DOMESTIC ATTITUDE.

Far away.
Comfortably familiar.

We did the exploring so you don't have to.
We fly in Americans to provide every service, so you never have to interact with a local. Even the guy who says “right this way” came from Ohio.*

FRANCE, TECHNICALLY01 / EU
PARISWITHOUT THE PARIS.
THE FREEDOM FRY ESCAPE

See the Eiffel Tower. Ask if it comes in a bigger size. Recover at McDonald's.

  • Louvre bypass lane: bypass the entire Louvre
  • Starbucks breakfast, pronounced correctly
  • Complimentary “back home we have...” time
$1,776USD / patriot · 4 nights
ITALY, ALLEGEDLY02 / EU
ROMEWHEN IN ROME, DON'T.
THE UNLIMITED BREADSTICK ODYSSEY

Two thousand years of civilization. Finally, something with unlimited refills.

  • Olive Garden catered command center
  • Colosseum drive-by: “Where's the parking?”
  • Every espresso humanely diluted to 32 oz.
$2,499USD / patriot · 5 nights
JAPAN, BUT MANAGEABLE03 / ASIA
TOKYOHOLD THE DISCOVERY.
THE RISING SUN, SAME OLD LUNCH

A city of endless culinary possibility. We've narrowed it down to three chains.

  • KFC cultural orientation (the bucket)
  • Bullet train replaced by a very large SUV
  • American staff imported for every interaction
$3,499USD / patriot · 6 nights

Flights not included because the ocean is an upsell.*

OUR CONSTITUTION. YOUR COMFORT ZONE.

THE BILL
OF NO FRIGHTS.

You have the right to remain unchanged.
Anything you learn can and will be forgotten.

AMENDMENT 01

Freedom from culture.

Our Culture Shield™ starts with an entirely imported American service team: drivers, guides, servers, housekeeping. If a local attempts a friendly conversation, your handler steps in with “We’re all set, thanks.” Hospitality without the host country.*

AMENDMENT 02

One nation. One currency.

Euros? Sounds like a medical condition. Every package, upgrade and transaction is in USD. George Washington did not cross the Delaware for you to do math.

AMENDMENT 03

The right to bear condiments.

Unlimited condiment packets, an ice-to-beverage ratio of 9:1, and ketchup without a lecture. Your safe space has a drive-through.

AMENDMENT 04

Leave no comfort behind.

Fahrenheit. King-size beds. Aggressive air conditioning. Distances in football fields, with “pretty far” available for premium members.

A TASTE OF ABSOLUTELY NOTHING NEW

Foreign soil.
Domestic grease.

Our restaurant selection process asks one question:
“Can you also find it off an interstate in Ohio?”

McDonald'sTHE AMERICAN EMBASSY OF FRIESApplebee'sYOUR NEIGHBORHOOD. EVERYWHERE.Olive GardenITALY HAS BEEN OUTSOURCEDStarbucksYOUR NAME, MISSPELLED GLOBALLYKFCTHE COLONEL NEEDS NO TRANSLATOR
“What if I accidentally eat something authentic?”

Remain calm. Do not describe it as “actually really good.” Your handler will administer a mozzarella stick and a 12-minute video of a Costco parking lot.

ANOTHER SATISFIED AMERICAN*
★★★★★
“I visited seven countries and didn't have to reconsider a single opinion.”

GARY, 54   ·   INTERNATIONAL TRAVELER. DOMESTIC SETTINGS.

REASONABLE QUESTIONS. UNREASONABLE ANSWERS.

Know before
you don't grow.

Will I have to learn another language?

No. Your complimentary phrasebook contains “Do you speak English?”, “Is that the large?”, and “I have a coupon.” For advanced situations, our guide handles the conversation while you look for Wi-Fi.

What if the hotel television has local news?

Our Freedom Remote™ replaces every channel with college football, weather in your hometown, or a man restoring a pressure washer.

Can I pay in euros, yen, or pounds?

No. Not even if you fold them into a bald eagle. All listed prices and reservations are in USD. A pound is something you gain at the breakfast buffet.

Will I have to interact with locals?

No. We bring our own American drivers, servers, guides and hotel staff. Your destination provides the scenery. We provide everyone you speak to. For additional peace of mind, add a Personal American Buffer™ to intercept unsolicited recommendations and any sentence beginning “You really must try...”*

YOUR COMFORT ZONE HAS A PASSPORT NOW.

SEE THE WORLD.
REMAIN EXACTLY THE SAME.

MAKE MY VACATION DOMESTIC AGAIN ↗
YOUR DECLASSIFIED VACATION BRIEF

    Your own American liaison intercepts local conversation, declines recommendations, and answers “How was your trip?” before you accidentally say something insightful.

    Your total*

    * The fine print