The page the asterisks were plotting to send you to
DISCLOSURES & QUALIFICATIONS
This page steps out of character where needed so the joke does not pretend to be actual commerce.
Entertainment scope
Ungoverned Threads is a fictional company in the SoftBoulders collection. The company, products, corporate departments, manifestos, exchange claims, shipping claims and other business representations are satire and entertainment.
No sales, payments or barter
The site does not sell or ship garments and does not accept cryptocurrency, precious metals, barter, ammunition, government currency or any other payment. Purchase-like buttons open local demonstrations only. They do not create an order, account, reservation, payment, invoice or enforceable contract.
No tax or evasion service
Jokes about taxation, permits, customs, government agencies and off-grid commerce are jokes. The site does not provide tax-evasion, customs-evasion, smuggling or regulatory-avoidance services or instructions. Real legal and tax obligations depend on actual facts and applicable law.
Measurement tool
The Measurement Sovereignty form runs locally in the visitor's browser. It preserves the text entered into the page only long enough to render the on-page writ. It does not submit the entries to a server or store them after the page is refreshed.
Images and product concepts
Garment images are illustrative creative assets for the fictional collection. Product names, specifications and availability are invented for the site and should not be understood as an offer to sell a physical product.
Advertising
Third-party advertisements are separate from the fictional company content and are labeled as advertisements. SoftBoulders does not control the specific ad that may be shown. See the SoftBoulders privacy and advertising page for broader site information.
No professional advice
The satire is not legal, tax, investment, financial or regulatory advice. The practical measuring instructions are general garment-measurement guidance, not a guarantee of fit for any manufacturer.